Can you imagine being stable every single moment in life? How can we not react when our boss yells at us?? How can we not get frustrated when things don’t go our way for a very long period of time? How can we be kind every moment? I am just going to tackle the negative extremity in this blog. All of us can currently do with more positivity.
Stability – a word often confused with non reaction, no excitement, and lack of enthusiasm or boredom!
I believe stability lends you enthusiasm and ecstasy for performing the best in any environment. Stability helps in preserving the joy that can easily be lost due to any happening or non – happening of an event.
By definition stable means: not likely to give way or overturn.
Last few days have been highly uncertain for me. Something or the other kept happening which was beyond my control. I found myself annoyed, angry or exuberant. It was a swing of extreme emotions. All I wished was for some stability and that’s when the magic happened. The following thought process helped me and hopefully will be useful to you too.
S – Stick to what is
When things don’t go your way, one tends to dwell in “it should have been this way” “it could have been that way” “if only it were this way” “I wish this/that happened” – In short one tends to be in a world other than the reality. The best way forward is to stick to what is rather than what should or could be.
T – The speed of acceptance matters
It is only human to get upset. So get angry, your stability is a function of how soon you accept the current reality. It is not that stable human beings don’t have feelings or don’t get hurt but their speed of acceptance is faster than others. They travel from what could be to what is very quickly. They reach starting point (which is always this moment forward) very quickly.
A – Appreciative eye
This is bit difficult but not impossible. In fact with practice becomes natural. When there is one positive and three negatives happening, it’s obvious that the negatives will take over, so let’s cheat and keep on repeating the positive.
If on a given day, all that happened my way was attending the yoga class, I simply have to remind myself and repeat as many times “ I got to attend my yoga class” so that it overpowers – traffic, internet not working and drilling work upstairs!
B – Be comfortable in your shoes
It is natural to start comparing your bad days with everyone else’s good days. The best thing here is simply to be comfortable in your own shoes as you could be assuming that everyone else’s good days are everyday. I am not saying make yourself feel good by thinking of someone else’s tragedies but simply be ok and comfortable in your own shoes. You will reach the starting point (this point forward) quicker.
L – Let go
Just like the appreciative eye is used to reinforce positivity, by letting go you eliminate negativity. The ability to let go increases your mental stability as you reach the starting point (this point forward) faster. Now the question comes how to increase the ability to let go – the answer is highly individualistic as each will have his/her own way. For me personally Louise Hay’s method of saying the affirmation “I am willing to let go” works the best.
E – Expect less (in return)
By saying expect less, I in no way mean to say that you should be an under achiever. Expect from yourself to take charge only that which is in your hands. The moment you start expecting a situation to turn out in your favor or a person to respond in particular way you are setting up yourself for possibility of disappointment.
Being stable gives you back your control. It gives you calm and peace to function efficiently.
Next time you feel overwhelmed; just follow the quick steps to feel STABLE and get going!