My dance teacher had once told me – “To become a good dancer you will need commitment along with passion. Commitment is coming for practice even when other things are not hunky dory.” That conversation is the inspiration for this article.
Many of us start working on a goal with super enthusiasm. However on encountering even the slightest of setbacks we get upset, sad, disappointed, annoyed and eventually either give up or indefinitely postpone the goal. We want everything to be smooth and why not? No harm done in wanting things to be picture perfect but it’s a very rare scenario that everything remains picture perfect in this dynamic environment. We can make every frame perfect if we take charge!
For us to achieve anything, there are two primary factors at play – the internal environment and the external environment. The external environment involves numerous factors and you have no control over it. The internal environment also has multiple factors (we are complicated beings!) but here you are the controller.
We love to plan, plan, and plan, but sometimes fail to take charge of our actions. It’s simply because we make the internal environment (our own actions & reactions) dependent on the external environment. That’s the premise of our planning. We build a strong dependency cord between the two. Now, suppose the external environment is stirred a bit, our premise gets shaken and as a result our internal mechanism crumbles. Sooner or later we give up on our goal and ask that very special question “Why does this always happen to me?”
How about I share a framework that will help you take CHARGE in any situation?
Taking charge can be simply put as –
Let me explain with an example what I mean by Higher Action and Grueling
E.g.: My goal is to lose weight. My sister gets an out of turn promotion and has a party at my favorite restaurant. My sister’s promotion is not an unpleasant event here but the fact that I will indulge at my favorite restaurant while trying to lose weight is the grueling task. Now it’s up to me what action I take – skip the dessert, eat healthy at home and just have nibble at the party or try and stick to soup. Our natural impulse is to choose an action within our comfort zone. For instance in this case I would choose to skip dessert (this comes naturally to me as I am not that fond of sweets!). This, however, is an opportunity for me to push myself towards my weight loss goal by choosing to have only soup. By doing so, I commit myself to a higher action (in comparison to my comfort zone) and will be closer towards achieving my goal.
Taking CHARGE implies committing to a higher action in any situation. By using this framework, you will become aware that there is always a path that takes you closer to your goals.This can entail coming out of comfort zone. You consciously make an effort to stick to the higher possible action and over time you will see that this higher action being dynamic, helps you progress rapidly towards the goal.
E.g. In the context of losing weight and going for party, my natural impulse is – skip dessert; higher action is have soup only ; in a couple of months the natural impulse will be having soup only while (further) higher action will call for eating at home and then heading to the restaurant.
With practice and more practice, there will surely come a day where no matter what the situation, you will take CHARGE towards fulfilling your goals. Taking charge stimulates out- of- box thinking to handle any situation rather than giving in. You start becoming creative as you cut the cord of dependency between internal and external environment.
Please feel free to contact me if you want to try something new to Take CHARGE and progress towards your goal by following a simple 3C model.